I know you want it.
Friday, April 27, 2007
4/27/2007 10:04:00 PM
I really think being emo is more or less my way of life now. I'm feeling so emo everyday, even if i'm listening to chirpy song, i will think about you. I will think about sending you this chirpy song when we are finally getting on well together. I will think about how nice it will be if we can listen to songs like this together, on the buses, on the trains...

When i listened to "Can't smile without you" on the bus today, that was all i think of.

Its not only emo songs that affect me anymore. I'm going crazy.

And i'm turning into a many-face person. I'm happy in front of my friends. I laugh and joke with them. Sometimes the happy feeling is genuine, sometimes as i was laughing, i am thinking of you at the same time.

Its like you are haunting me. I dunno why i feel this so often these days.. It isn't like this before. Maybe because im at a new environment..

But these few days, all i can think of everytime i does something is you.

And why am i a many-face person is because im always so cheerful in front of friends no matter how much pain of losing you is inside my heart.

But i know i'm realy just trying my best to be happy when i am with friends because i will feel sad when my friends feel sad.

And i don't know what i'm saying anymore. There's too many things i want to say but i dunno where to begin. Its something words cant describe at all.

I'm actually afraid of letting ppl know that i'm feeling sad because i find it hard to face the person the next time. I will always return to my smiling and hyper kelin each time i let it all out to let the person know im ok..

I dunno why im saying this. But its nothing new. I dunno why im saying all these anyway.

I wish my mind can be written into a book and this way i can know what im thinking of too. I'm thinking of so many things at the same time im going crazy.

And why can i still feel so calm when im typing this? And i even feel relaxed, unburdened. Not exactly agitated or emo. Is this the feeling of not knowing what you are thinking of anymore?

If thats the case, i hate this feeling. I want to kill this emo kelin. She sucks.

I suck at this.
The APPLE
HSS
NP ECH
Choir'03-06
Prefectorial Board'04-06
HeadFirstForHalos'05
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Until recently an active member of Concern Club'07
Good Apples
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